


The Wild Side

by BirdOfHermes



Series: The Thirst Trials [30]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, Canon Divergence - Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Crushes, Cunnilingus, Desk Sex, Dirty Talk, Eavesdropping, F/M, Fingerfucking, Flirting, Gossip, Office Party, Office Sex, POV First Person, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Rough Sex, SHIELD, SHIELD Agent Reader (Marvel), SHIELD Family, Secret Crush, Shyness, Size Kink, Slow Burn, Top Thor (Marvel), Wall Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:20:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25216135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BirdOfHermes/pseuds/BirdOfHermes
Summary: While chatting with a fellow SHIELD agent, Thor accidentally overhears your theory about his favorite sex position in the breakroom. To your absolute shock, he's not offended. As a matter of fact, he's completely up for some fun work gossip about sex. Against all odds, you decide to take a walk on the wild side and indulge him.
Relationships: Thor/Original Female Character, Thor/Reader, Thor/You
Series: The Thirst Trials [30]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1103739
Comments: 25
Kudos: 297





	The Wild Side

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know. I really don't. But props to saiansha as always for encouraging me to dump this nonsense on all of you because life is cruel and we are always in need of flirty Thor. 
> 
> As always, this is under the umbrella AU that Thanos didn't intercept Thor's ship and they reached Earth just fine, got settled, and Thor's working with the Avengers and SHIELD to protect the Earth in the meantime.

_Girls, you know you better watch out_

_Some guys, some guys are only about_

_That thing, that thing, that thing!_

_That thing, that thing, that thing!_

_-“Doo Wop (That Thing)” by Lauryn Hill_

__

No one is exempt from office gossip.

And I mean no one.

Not even secret agents and superheroes.

To be fair, I tried my best to stay out of it, but being at SHIELD HQ for so many hours every week and seeing the same people in the same place doing the same routine got boring after a while. I’d made some work friends and allies over time and we covered a wide range of subjects during our “watercooler” moments aka breaks in between the daily grind that took place in our enormous but comfy breakroom. It was good to have some conversation during the day when I wasn’t ferrying paperwork back and forth to the weapons vault. I was an agent in charge of intake for confiscated weaponry that the field agents, both SHIELD and the Avengers, retrieved during missions. 

The work friend on a similar schedule to my own was Madison. We had a little spot at one of the high tables with stools where we’d drink our coffee or tea and nibble on snacks together, recapping our days or just shooting the shit about anything.

Well, Madison decided she wanted to discuss a particular subject during one of our gab sessions.

“Do you think Captain America likes doggystyle sex?”

I nearly inhaled my granola bar. I managed to finish chewing without getting a chunk lodged in my lungs and gave her an affronted look. “Excuse me?”

“What?” she asked, tucking a black strand of hair behind one ear. “Just asking.”

“Well, don’t,” I hissed as I glanced around to be sure no one heard her. “Are you crazy? The Avengers all use this breakroom and if one of them heard you—”

“Oh, stop it,” she said with a roll of her eyes. “What are the odds they’d come by during one of our gab sessions? I’ve only ever seen Clint, Sam, and Natasha the whole time I’ve worked here.”

“That’s you,” I insisted. “I’ve seen Tony and Steve twice. I’m not trying to lose my job pondering Captain America’s sex position preferences.”

She grinned. “But you’re thinking about it, aren’t you?”

I averted my gaze into my mug of tea. “That is none of your business.”

“Come onnnnn,” she begged. “I’m dying here. Won’t you be just a little bit bad with me? Aren’t you the least bit curious?”

“No,” I lied. “It’s none of my business.”

“Well, it could be if you put yourself out there a bit more.”

I scoffed. “Yes, because I’m certainly enough to turn the head of an Avenger.”

Madison smirked. “Oh, like you don’t want to. I can think of a certain Asgardian whose head you’d love to be pointing in your general direction.”

I blushed. “Shut up. Everyone’s got a crush on Thor. I’m nothing special.”

“At least you admitted it. Fine, how about just our studly King of Asgard? What do you think he’s like in bed?”

I buried my face in one hand. “Please stop or I’m calling your supervisor.”

“Never. Just one guess. One itty bitty guess. It’s fun, I swear, I do this all the time with some of the other agents.”

I glared at her. “Gee, peer pressure, that’s nice.”

Madison rolled her eyes. “You’re boring and I’m dumping you as a friend.”

I choked on a laugh. “Like you can entertain yourself without me for the rest of forever.”

She made as if to stomp away and I caught the tail of her suit jacket, groaning. “Alright, you big baby.”

“Yay!” She scooted in close and waved a hand. “Go on. What do you think Thor’s favorite position is?”

I took a deep breath. “Well, I think…probably cowgirl. He’s a big guy and not every woman would want to be squished into the mattress—though God, would I ever—and maybe he’d enjoy letting his partner take the reins.”

Madison’s brown eyes shut and she sighed wistfully. “Yeah, wow, I bet that would be a thrill.”

“Uh-huh. And since you’re so hot to trot, what do you think?”

“I don’t know, I think he might be more like your traditional sort of guy and like it missionary-style, that way he has more control, and—” Without warning, Madison stiffened and then grabbed the inside of my arm, squeezing hard as she stared past me.

“OW! What, woman?!” I demanded, baffled by her clamming up, but then a second later, I felt a warm, heavy hand on my shoulder that patted me lightly.

“Excuse me,” a rich, rumbling baritone voice said from behind me. “I’m terribly sorry to bother you ladies, but would you be kind enough to show me how to work this coffee contraption?”

Heart hammering in my throat, I turned to see Thor, God of Thunder, standing there.

Television and pictures did not do him justice.

First off, he was so tall that I had to crane my neck to look into his face. I definitely had underestimated his height. Second off, his dimensions seemed almost impossible. He wore his Asgardian armor, but the more casual version of it—the dark grey and black leather, no sleeves, arm bands, trousers, and boots. His shoulders were so broad I knew I couldn’t wrap my arms halfway around them if I tried. His chest was massive and mighty, his biceps gleaming smooth and attractive, his forearms thick, his hands large. Third off, he was so handsome that I thought my legs would go out from under me as both my eyes locked onto that single, beautiful blue eye of his. His honey-blond beard was neatly trimmed and smelled like beeswax and a light cologne wafted off him, surrounding me in a heavenly cloud. Holy shit.

My mouth tumbled open stupidly for a second. “Uh.”

“Yes!” Madison exclaimed. “Yes, she will!”

Before I could do anything, Madison gave me a shove and I landed right in his arms, pressed completely down the length of that hard, gorgeous body. He caught me on reflex and then lifted me a little onto my feet, chuckling. “Oh, dear, are you alright?”

“Y-Yeah,” I mumbled, and then sent a death glare over my shoulder at Madison as I straightened up. “Sorry, I…tripped. Here, I’ll show you.”

Oh God, oh God, oh God, had he heard us? I tried my best to appear calm as the two of us walked over to the counter together towards the giant industrial grade coffeemaker. I cleared my throat, still blushing up a storm, and pointed to the top. “So, um, all you have to do is make sure the coffee pot’s nice and clean and it’s under this part. You hit this button that says brew and then it’ll pour a fresh pot, but if you want something other than just a plain medium roast, there’s some other settings. You can add steamed milk for a latte or a cappuccino and then there’s these little buttons here for flavor shots of caramel or chocolate and then this last button here is for espresso.”

“Espresso,” Thor said brightly. “Yes, yes, that’s the one I need.”

“Okay.” I pointed to the smaller spout to one side. “For the espresso, you just need to place your cup or mug under here since it doesn’t make a whole pot, just a single serving at a time. There’s creamer, milk, and sugar right there on the counter.”

“Marvelous,” the demigod said as he grabbed a paper cup and popped it under the espresso spout. “I am in your debt, my lady. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” I told him, smiling as best as I could, and then chewed my lip. I glanced at Madison’s panicked look and she waved at me frantically. “Um, I’m sorry, I…did you, uh…”

“Yes?” Thor asked, lifting his brows.

I blushed even harder. “Did you…happen to…h-hear what we were talking about?”

To my utter shock, Thor gave me a slow, sly smile. “Will it embarrass you if I did?”

I cringed. “Oh, God. I am so sorry, Thor. We were just being stupid and we were bored and we have no excuse at all to act so childish—”

He held up a hand as the coffeemaker beeped and then he withdrew his cup. “My lady, I am simply teasing you. I am not the least bit offended.”

“But it’s so inappropriate and we are at work and—”

“My lady, the hours are long and things can get quite dull around here,” he said as he poured some sugar and cream into the cup. “I understand completely that sometimes the subject matter up for discussion can be a bit…”

He paused. “What is the term…unorthodox?”

I bit my lip again. “Are you sure you’re not upset? Really, I know it was none of my business.”

“I am not upset, I assure you. I’m curious.”

I blinked up at him. “Huh?”

“I am curious what makes you think what you do about my favorite position during sex.” He calmly sipped his espresso while my eyes went huge and I gaped at him in total disbelief.

“Uh…I…” I licked my lips and tried to think. “W-Well, I just thought that you seemed like a very open, flexible kind of man and you would enjoy a partner who is comfortable with being the center of attention.”

“Hmm…” he hummed. “Interesting.”

I tried not to fidget. “Are you still teasing me?”

He grinned. “Yes. You’re very cute when you’re flustered.”

I covered my burning cheeks with both hands. “Oh, goody.”

Thor let out a warm, playful laugh. “My lady, please relax. May I confess something to you?”

I peeked at him through my fingers. “What?”

“On Asgard, we are not as…” He paused again. “…reserved about matters of sex and attraction as you are here on Midgard. We openly discuss such things among each other and feel no shame for it as long as it is within good taste. I understand why you would not want to discuss such things in the workplace, but know that it does not offend me in the slightest to hold such conversations.”

Thor smiled before adding, “Especially not with pretty girls.”

I almost keeled over dead on the spot.

“But,” he said, his single eye twinkling. “You should know that if you do want to pursue this avenue of conversation, it is a double-edged sword. I am willing to share my answers in exchange for yours.”

Eep.

He nodded to me, then to Maddie, and then gave us both one last charming smile before he took his espresso and left. “Until next time, ladies.”

Thor walked out of the breakroom, humming cheerfully. The second he was gone, I locked eyes with Madison and snarled, “you are a _dead woman.”_

* * *

Thanks to my utterly embarrassing first meeting with Thor, I didn’t show my face in the breakroom for over a week, instead bringing coffee or tea with me from home. However, I did get a hankering for some snacks and I’d gotten tired of Maddie sending me mopey texts that she missed me, so I finally resurfaced at our usual time of day.

“Have you learned your lesson?” I demanded as I plopped down on the stool.

“Are you kidding me? The God of Thunder said he’s willing to volunteer the juicy details of his boudoir antics. You’d be an idiot not to take him up on that offer.”

I facepalmed. “Maddie, seriously. What is the matter with you?”

“What’s the matter with you?” she retorted. “Don’t you want to know what rustles his jimmies?”

“No!”

She gave me a skeptical look. “Uh-huh. If you didn’t care, you’d be back in your office still sulking, so sure. Go ahead and live that lie.”

I rolled my eyes. “It’s dangerous territory. Sure, we can learn about him, but we’d have to give in order to get and I so don’t want the God of Thunder to know about my barren love life.”

“It’s not that serious,” she insisted. “We’re just having a little fun. There’s no judgment involved. You can tell by how he was teasing you that he’s not expecting this to go anywhere and he won’t be telling our secrets to other people. You’ve got to learn to live a little. I mean, when will you ever get this kind of a chance again?”

I scowled. She had a point. I knew women who would give their left arm for a chance for between the sheets chats with Thor. “Even so, there’s no guarantee he’ll even be back around this time of day on a regular basis. For all you know, we’ll never see him again.”

Madison just smiled smugly at me. I closed my eyes. “He’s standing right behind me, isn’t he?”

“Yup.”

“I hate you.” I pivoted to find the handsome God of Thunder smiling pleasantly at me. “Good afternoon, your highness.”

“No need for the formalities, ladies,” he said. “Just Thor, if you please.”

“Hi, Thor,” Madison giggled, giddy as a schoolgirl. “How are things in the world saving business?”

“Just fine,” he said with a wink as he pulled out my stool for me and then took a seat to my right. “I hope you are both faring well this week.”

“Certainly,” Madison mused. “Why, just this morning, I stapled two whole documents together. My life is an unending marathon of excitement.”

Thor chuckled. “Good to know.”

Maddie’s brown eyes gleamed dangerously. “Speaking of excitement…perhaps you’re willing to settle our original debate for us.”

I sent her a desperate look, but she just ignored me. “We are genuinely curious about your favorite position.”

I kicked her ankle under the table, but it just made her smile even more wickedly. Damn her.

“Well, I certainly don’t mind settling the debate.” He glanced at me. “Our mutual friend was right.”

“Friend?” I asked, raising my brows. “When did that happen?”

Thor pouted. “You do not wish to be my friend, my lady?”

I laughed before I could stop myself. “Thor, I would be absolutely delighted to be your friend.”

“Wonderful.” He glanced at Madison. “And you as well.”

“Friends for life,” she declared.

“Splendid. Now then, I do believe that I established that divulging certain information goes both ways.”

My cheeks heated up as hot as my tea. “R-Right.”

I glanced at Madison. “This is your fault, so you first.”

She snorted and rolled her eyes. “Alright, Chicken Boo.”

Madison cleared her throat and hushed her voice a bit. “Personally, I happen to be a fan of doggystyle. I like the ability to move around but I like being directed at times as well.”

Thor nodded. “I see. An excellent choice indeed.”

He then glanced at me and I wanted to sprint for the door, but I made myself stay put and answer, since it was only fair. “I, um, I prefer missionary myself. I tend to be a bit more on the, um, submissive side.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Thor said with a soft, knowing smile. Gah.

“Okay, I just have to ask,” Madison said, leaning in. “Do you sleep with women on Earth?”

“I am certainly considering it,” Thor said honestly. “It has been quite some time since Jane and I am not opposed to the idea.”

Madison propped her head up on one hand. “So no one night stands yet?”

Thor cocked his head slightly and I elaborated. “That’s what we call it when two people have sex just once, usually after meeting the same day they have sex. It’s kind of a staple in hookup culture.”

“Ah. Not yet, no.”

Madison giggled again. “I bet you don’t even need a pickup line at this point. You could walk merrily down the street and get four hundred dates without even opening your mouth.” 

Thor smiled. “I suppose I could, but that is no fun. I much prefer to chase after a good woman.”

Madison grinned. “And what do you do once you catch her?”

“Maddie,” I fussed. “Seriously.”

“Whaaaat?” she said, giving me big, faux innocent eyes. “Inquiring minds want to know.”

“You are so shameless.”

“Are you saying that you are not curious as well, my lady?” Thor asked.

This time when I looked at Thor, I really sized him up. I ignored the screaming Kermit flail state of my brain that reminded me that I was talking to an actual Norse god and paid attention to his words, his expression, and weighed it with what had gone down the first time we met.

Thor was _flirting with me._

In fact, he’d revealed his hand that day we met, telling me I was cute when I was flustered. He was trying to rustle my jimmies on purpose. Hmm…that changed things.

I relaxed my posture and took a casual sip of my tea. “Well, your highness, it’s like you said. You can’t get something for nothing. On Midgard, we call it quid pro quo. You show me yours and I’ll show you mine.”

Thor’s smile widened considerably. “Yes, equal exchange is what we agreed upon. What would you like to know?”

I gave it some thought. “You are a very big, very strong man. Have you ever tried the Stand and Carry position?”

“Oh, many times,” he said casually. “It’s a favorite of mine, in fact. It’s particularly desirable with a partner who is sensitive.”

I fought the urge to swoon. Beside me, Madison gulped. Thor was cool as a cucumber as he took another sip of his espresso. “If you would be kind enough to answer the question.”

“Yes,” I said crisply. “Happy?”

He gave me a million dollar grin. “Aye.”

As if things were not bad enough, he reached into the fruit bowl and then bit into a peach. The juice ran down one side of those soft lips and he licked it away, sucking a bit off his thumb as well. Jesus H. Christ. I’d seen actual porn that wasn’t anywhere near as sexy as that couple of seconds.

“I’m gonna fucking die,” Madison muttered absently beside me. “I’ll be right back.”

She stumbled away from the table and headed in the direction of the restroom. I completely understood. It was only by the grace of God that I hadn’t slid onto the floor in a senseless pile of bones.

“So,” Thor continued. “Tell me more about courtship on Midgard. I shall have to prepare myself if I am to reenter the rituals of romance.”

Try as I might, I couldn’t tear my gaze away from watching him devour the peach. I was certain he knew as much and was still just teasing me, but I didn’t care. What a show. “Well, it all comes down to simple communication. Making sure you both want the same thing. The most tedious parts of dating are men who play games and pretend they want one thing but instead want something else. Being transparent is a good thing in your case.”

He winced. “That is unfortunate to hear. I am sorry. It is shameful for men to deceive women for their own selfish purposes rather than simply finding a woman who wants the same things that he does.”

I shrugged. “Those sorts of guys are impatient and don’t care enough to do so. That won’t be a problem for you, I imagine.”

“I try my best to be honest,” he said. “Especially in matters of attraction.”

I eyed the peach. “Clearly.”

Thor grinned. “No one ever accused me of being a subtle man.”

“No shit,” I snorted. “Is this something you normally do? Find a couple of SHIELD agents and purposely ruffle their feathers?”

“To be honest, I am just now getting settled and I am in search of simple companionship,” he admitted. “And you and your friend presented me with the ideal opportunity for a bit of mischief.”

“I thought that was your brother’s department.”

Thor smirked. “Where do you think he got it from?”

Oh, my. Again, I fought not to fall off the stool. He was extremely good at flirting.

Thor peeled the last piece of the peach off of the pit and went to eat it, but instead, I plucked it from his hand and ate it. Then I winked at him and stood, chewing the fruit slowly before I spoke. “Where indeed. See you around, big guy.”

Thor chuckled. “Until next time, my lady.”

* * *

“So let me ask you this,” Maddie said, a week later, her brown eyes fixed on the Norse god. “Ever been in a threesome?”

Thor lifted an eyebrow. “Why? Do you have some ideas I need to know about?”

She trilled out a laugh. “You naughty god, no. I’m being genuine.”

“Yes,” he answered. “I may be in a dry period, as they call it, but I certainly was not in my younger years.”

“I knew it,” Madison said. “What about orgies?”

I wheezed. “Maddie!”

“What? I mean, he is basically a space Viking.”

Thor chortled. “Once or twice, but no more than that. I prefer a more intimate setting. What about you, Lady Madison?”

“Eh, threesome in college, but it was nothing to write home about,” she said dismissively. “The guy had no clue what he was doing, so me and the girl just had our fun and that was that.”

Thor glanced at me expectantly. I held up my hands. “Sorry, I clearly did not have the rollicking social life that the two of you did in previous years.”

“This is a no judgment zone,” Madison said. “That’s perfectly fine. We both know you can snare any man you want any time you want.”

I snorted. “In what parallel universe is that true? I can barely meet eyes with the cute barista at Starbucks. What the hell makes you think I can snag any guy ever?”

“I certainly do not see why not,” Thor said. “You are lovely and smart and poised and very funny.”

“That has nothing to do with being able to seduce a guy, Thor.”

He frowned. “How so?”

I sighed. “Most guys want that really sexy, alluring kind of woman. You know, girls that stand out and are extroverted. They don’t ask out girls like me, not unless they’re out of options.”

I went to sip my tea, but Thor touched my wrist gently. I blinked up at him, finding his expression sincere and surprisingly firm.

“My lady,” he said. “Any man like that is not a man at all, but a boy. You are no one’s last resort. That I can promise.”

For a second, I didn’t even know what to say in return. No one had ever said that to me before. Eventually, I managed to swallow past my dry throat and mumble, “T-Thank you.”

He squeezed fondly and then let me go. “I admire that you are still even willing to give these unscrupulous men a chance to court you.”

“Well, no one’s running for that position at present, so it’s not really that bad of an issue.”

“Hmm.”

“What?”

“Nothing.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Uh-huh, sure.”

“Okay, _now_ I’ve got a good one,” Madison said excitedly. “Let’s pretend we don’t all work for SHIELD. Would you have sex with either or both of us?”

I sprayed tea all over the table.

“Madison Ellen Moore,” I hissed, blushing so hard I thought my head would detonate. “Have you lost your mind?”

Madison crossed her arms. “Oh, like you don’t want to know.”

I pointed at Thor. “Do _not_ answer that.”

Thor shook with laughter, his blue eye shining with mirth. “Why not?”

“Because you cannot put that genie back in the bottle once it’s out,” I snarled, glaring at Madison again before cleaning up the mess. “I forbid you from answering that question.”

“Ugh, you’re so mean!” Madison whined. “That was a good one.”

There was a buzzing sound and she checked her phone, groaning. “Dammit, my stupid conference call is about to start.”

She stood and then snapped her fingers. “That reminds me! Thor, there’s that Avengers mixer tonight. Are you going?”

“Yes, I had planned on it.”

“Aces,” she said cheerfully. “We’ll see you there.”

I choked on my tea and gave her an incredulous look. “We’ll what?”

Madison beamed at me. “Oh, yes, girlfriend, you’re getting dolled up and socialized tonight.”

“But—”

“Ah, ah! You’re going, end of discussion. Right, Thor?”

I gave him a desperate look. He smiled. “I am afraid I must side with Lady Madison. You deserve to have a night out with friends.”

“Ugh,” I whined. “But that means putting on makeup and shaving my legs!”

“Tough titty,” Madison chirped on her way out. “See you tonight at nine o’clock, darlings!”

I let my head thunk on the table. “Thor, you traitor.”

He chuckled and rubbed my back. It felt wonderful. “My apologies. However, I think it is for the best.”

“You would,” I muttered sourly. “That’s exactly how you’re going to end your dry period.”

“Oh, is that right?” he asked haughtily.

“Of course it is. These female SHIELD agents just needed the slightest excuse to get liquor’d up and throw themselves at you. They’ll be all over you like white on rice.”

He quit rubbing my back. Instead, Thor slid his hand up my neck and then under my chin, tilting my head so I’d be looking at him. The playful smile on his lips made me entirely too warm for being in the middle of the breakroom. “Pardon my impertinence, my lady, but you sound jealous.”

I scowled. “Oh, you wish, God of Thunder.”

He shrugged and dropped his hand. “It was merely an observation, my dear.”

“I’m not jealous,” I sniffed. “Because I’m not stupid enough to let myself be attracted to you.”

“How very wise and practical of you.”

I glared. “Smartass.”

“Regardless of my backside’s education,” he said as he stood. “I shall see you tonight, my lady.”

“Pfft. Not if I have anything to say about it.”

He leaned in for just a moment, giving me a minor heart attack. “Then it’s a good thing you don’t.”

And with that, he sauntered out of the breakroom and I accepted my unfortunate fate.

* * *

Half past nine o’clock that night, I stood just outside of the rec room impatiently texting Madison, who had yet to show. I’d already had a margarita to calm my nerves, but the longer she didn’t reply, the more I wanted to grab a second one. Thanks to Mr. Stark, it was an open bar mixer.

Finally fed up, I dialed her number. It took a while, but she eventually answered. “Woman, where are you?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, honey, I got hung up. I’m not gonna be able to make it.”

“Are you kidding me?” I screeched. “This was your idea! You made me get dressed up to come to this dumb party and then ditch me at the last second?”

“I’m so sorry,” she said. “I really am.”

“I have half a mind to—wait.” I stilled. “Madison…you’re not trying to play matchmaker with me and Thor, right?”

“…no?”

I shut my eyes. “I’m gonna slit your throat.”

“Listen to me,” she said. “I know you don’t see it, but Thor is into you. Totally into you. I didn’t want to be in the way. I really think if you just give yourself a break, then you’ll see that he’s interested and it could be a great opportunity for you.”

“Madison, you’re mental. He’s not into me. He’s just a flirt. That’s all.”

She sighed. “God, you’re thick as brick. Give him a chance. That’s all I’m asking.”

“This all started because of you, and now you’re telling me you ship us?”

“I totally ship it,” she said severely. “I couldn’t ship it harder if I tried. I’m telling you, just go back to that party and he will find you and make a move. As God as my witness, Thor wants to tap that—”

I hung up on her. “I should have known better.”

“How so?” a familiar male voice said from behind me.

I sighed. “Madison’s not coming.”

“Oh, dear,” Thor said. “Is something wrong?”

“Yes,” I grumbled. “But it’s nothing for you to worry about, I promise.”

I turned to face him and almost keeled over yet again. Thor had finally given some Midgardian clothing a go rather than his Asgardian outfit. He wore a sleek navy suit, no tie, a couple buttons undone to go for that more casual look. His hair was lightly tousled, as if he’d been dancing, and the smile he aimed in my direction made my poor bare, freshly shaved legs want to give out like always.

I tried to hide my staring with a hasty comment. “Nice suit.”

“Thank you,” he said warmly, his eye tracking over me. I’d admittedly made an effort this time, wearing a plum dress that hugged my curves nicely with a pair of plain black pumps and silver jewelry. “You look lovely.”

“Thanks. Um, since Maddie’s not coming I’m probably just gonna go home.”

“Oh, please stay for just a while,” he said. “There are party games and drinking games and—”

“I know, I just…” I licked my lips. “I’m kind of a mess at parties. Madison is my awkwardness buffer. Without her, I’m gonna be uncomfortable and probably say or do something stupid.”

Thor examined me for a moment. The flashing lights from inside made his lone eye brighter and stand out even more against his handsome face. “I understand. I am not asking you to be someone else or to be like her. I…”

He cleared his throat a little, giving me a surprisingly shy look. “I enjoy your company. Would you stay just for a while? With me?”

My heart tried to crack open my rib cage and yeet itself into his waiting hands.

I mean, who could say no to that face?

Damn him.

“Okay,” I said. “Because it’s you. But we’d better find me another drink first.”

“I am happy to help.” He offered me his arm and I took it. We strode back into the party and up to the bar, ordering a martini for me and a whiskey for Thor. As predicted, a lot of girls tried to pry him away from me, but he politely declined their advances as we made our way towards the faux casino games set up along the far wall. It only took a second for Thor to completely seize control and within minutes, I was actually having a ball teaching him how to play craps and 21 and poker.

As the night wore on, little things began to change. It started simply with touching. He had his arm around me when we moved to different stations, just over my waist, nothing overt, but it felt nice. Comfortable. Then, at the poker table, we ran out of chairs, so I sat sideways over one of his thighs, explaining the game to him while our other coworkers chimed in to help until he understood it completely. They let me help him for the first round and then once he picked it up, I settled in to watch the game, and I was surprised by how natural it felt to be beside him. I didn’t feel awkward about it for some reason. Surprisingly, no one made any comments about it, either. I did get some ugly looks from the girls who had tried to get his attention earlier when they passed by, but that was it. I sort of just…fit in for once.

How strange.

Before I knew it, we’d been there a couple of hours and I didn’t mind it, which was pretty rare for me. Thor asked if I wanted to get some fresh air, so we snuck out onto the balcony together.

“Having fun?” he asked cheerfully.

“Yes, actually,” I admitted, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. “Don’t say ‘I told you so’ or I’m leaving.”

Thor chuckled as he slid out of his suit jacket. “I would not dream of doing so, my lady.”

He draped the jacket over my shoulders. I practically disappeared inside his suit jacket, which made me laugh a bit, seeing how tiny I was compared to all those muscles he had on him. I tucked my hands into his pockets and almost did a double take as I felt something rather familiar. I withdrew a gold foil condom packet and just lifted an eyebrow at Thor. He had the grace to blush and explain himself.

“Not my idea,” he insisted. “It was Tony. He knew this would be my first recreational activity with SHIELD, so he wanted me to be prepared, as he called it.”

I giggled. “Thor, there’s like ten of them in here.”

Thor coughed. “Well, that would be because I unwisely told Tony of one of my most famous exploits.”

“Which was?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I…once had sex quite a lot of times in the span of one day.”

“How many times are we talking here, God of Thunder?”

He smiled then. “Guess.”

“What do I win if I’m close to the number?”

“I’ll buy your lunch on Monday.”

“Hmm…” I tapped the condom against my lips just to mess with him. He stared at my lips rather intensely. I’d have given my right arm to know what he was thinking while he was looking at me. “I’m going to say…eight.”

Thor nodded. “Good guess. I owe you lunch.”

“Oh? Was I right?”

“Close. It was twelve.”

My jaw punched through several levels of the building. _“Twelve?!”_

Thor blushed harder. “It was on Asgard. She was to return to her home world the next day and we knew we’d likely never see each other again, so we were a bit overzealous saying goodbye.”

“No shit,” I sputtered. “Jesus, Thor. That’s some kind of stamina, even for a god. I can’t believe you didn’t die of blood loss or heart failure.”

Thor laughed. “It is a wonder, yes, but we managed. It was not all in the same few hours, I promise.”

I eyed the condom. “Does this even fit you?”

He shifted his weight. I recognized that gesture. When I glanced up at him, the smirk on his lips was very, very private and it made me shiver all over. “Do you think it fits?”

I swallowed hard. I suddenly felt too hot and too drunk and too stupid to be standing here talking about condom sizes with the God of Thunder. I could always tease him and say, “let’s find out,” but that was a door that I wasn’t sure I was ready to open. It was silly that our entire friendship had been based on teasing each other about sex, yet the very thought of sex with Thor turned me into a stammering, nervous teenager again. God, a gal should be so lucky.

“Quid pro quo,” I murmured.

Thor nodded. “Go on.”

My racing heart made the words spill out of me before I could think about them. “What are you like in bed?”

Thor played it cool for a few seconds and then answered rather softly. “Depends on the girl. Some girls like to be dominant, and I have no problem with that. In fact, I enjoy it. Other girls prefer to be submissive, so I step into that role for them. I do not have a preference, I suppose, for I simply wish to show my lady a good time.”

He stepped closer to me. I didn’t back off. My legs weren’t working. “If I were with, let us say, a girl like you, then I would likely take the lead.”

Thor lifted a hand and gently ran his thumb over the edge of my lower lip. “I would tease you. I would play with you a bit, maybe subdue you.”

He licked his bottom lip, his voice deepening with arousal as he continue to stroke my lower lip softly. “Taste your cunt. Bring you on my tongue once or twice, then my fingers. Once you were nice and wet for me, I’d fuck you up against the wall first. Let you feel my strength. Get you used to the feel of my cock inside you. Then I’d have you, standing up, make you come again. Then I’d take you to bed and fuck you nice and deep with your pretty legs around me, moaning for me with that sweet little voice as I went faster and faster. I’d have you coming on my cock over and over, until your whole body was shaking apart, until you begged me to stop. Then I’d come for you.”

With every word, he’d drifted just a little closer. By the time he finished his speech, we were so close that I could smell the whiskey on his breath, for he’d stooped over me, his thumb sliding to my cheek as he leaned in to kiss me.

The balcony door opened and someone from my department called my name.

I jerked upright and tossed the condom over the side of the balcony, snapping to attention. “Yes?”

“I’m so sorry to bother you,” Jared said, apparently not noticing that Thor had also quickly stepped back so no one would know what we’d just been about to do. “You know that file from earlier? Could you drop that in Jenkins’ mailbox before you head home tonight?”

I nodded too many times. “Yeah, no biggie, got it.”

“Thanks a million.” He disappeared back inside.

Which left me in a very awkward silence with Thor.

I swallowed to wet my incredibly dry throat. “Um, I-I should get that.”

Thor nodded to me. “Yes, I understand.”

I started to walk away. With every step, I yelled at myself internally louder and louder. _Don’t blow it. Don’t blow it. Don’t—_

I stopped mid-stride. Then I turned to look back at him. “Well, I mean, it would only take a minute if you wanna come with.”

Thor took a deep breath. “Are you certain?”

I nodded. “Yeah.”

He smiled and followed me inside. We rode the elevator down to my floor. I fished my keys out of my purse and unlocked the door to my office. It wasn’t huge, but it was a nice size, no windows, just a frosted glass panel on the door. I was at the end of the hall, so only one neighbor, which reduced the amount of noise I had to hear. And vice versa.

Which was important because by the time Thor pushed the door shut and locked it, we were both on each other like horny prom dates.

Thor’s lips were just as soft as they’d looked while he was eating that peach. His beard tickled and scratched my cheeks as he kissed me ravenously, losing one of those big hands in my hair as he yanked my head back. His other hand pushed the suit jacket off my shoulders and then grabbed my ass. I mewled into his mouth as he cupped it and then used it as a handle to scoop me off the floor. He carried me a few steps to the nearest sturdy wall with no photos or diplomas on it and pressed me into it.

I undid the buttons to his dress shirt as he slid the hem of my dress up until it bunched at my upper thighs. He found my lacy underwear and rolled it down my legs. I hissed as the cold air hit my already achingly wet slit, my core throbbing impatiently for attention. The only light came from the hallway, casting him in noir black and white all over. His chest was simply magnificent. I clawed at his pectoral muscles and fondled his abs, listening to the growls that left him when I touched him.

I didn’t know what to expect, but what I certainly didn’t was that he would break from my lips and sink on one knee on the carpet in front of me. I wanted to ask why, but then he lifted one of my legs onto his shoulder and buried his face into the supple flesh of my thigh. I cried out as he rubbed his beard along the delicate skin and kissed and nipped at it, sliding higher towards the bunched material of my dress.

Thor’s hot mouth surrounded my cunt all at once. I just barely managed to clap a hand over my mouth as I screamed in delight as pleasure shot straight through my veins like tequila. Oh, fuck yeah.

He let out a slow, lustful exhale against me and then dragged his tongue up over my slick walls, one big hand holding my leg in place, the other flat to my lower tummy with his thumb resting against my clit. “You’re very sweet, my lady.”

I couldn’t see his face all that well from this angle, but I heard the humor in his voice. “Sweet as a peach.”

Before I could reply, he attacked me again. I buried my other hand into his golden locks and moaned into my hand as Thor’s talented tongue swept heavenly patterns across my cunt again and again, until I could barely stand, which was why he’d propped me up against the wall. His thumb swiped against my clit at just the right time, tripling the pleasure, driving me to the brink of madness in only minutes. He traced the shape of me and then lost his tongue inside me, moving it back and forth rhythmically until I was crying out his name and riding his face.

“Fuck!” I came quickly, without warning, the tightness at my core finally snapping. Bliss doused me from head to toe.

But Thor didn’t stop there.

He slid his mouth higher, taking over where his thumb had been, and slid two fingers inside me next.

“Thor! God, oh shit, Thor!” I could do nothing but moan as he quickly brought me again on his hand, pumping those thick fingers inside, stretching me open, fucking them deep. I lasted barely a couple of minutes before succumbing again, my senses flooded with euphoria as he sucked at my clit with just enough pressure to send me over the edge.

My legs were jelly as he rose from where he knelt and pulled the top half of my dress down, exposing the bra beneath it. It snapped apart and he kneaded my breasts in those big hands, his heavy frame still flattening me to the wall, completely in control of my body. He kissed the spot over my heart, rubbing his chin over my collarbone to tease me, slipping each breast inside his mouth one at a time before his hands wandered down towards his slacks.

“You never told me,” Thor drawled as his belt unbuckled and the zipper slid down his pelvis. “Do you think the condom would fit?”

I shook my head, slurring, “Fuck no.”

Thor chuckled as he lifted his cock from his boxer briefs. He was hung. Of course he was.

I just started laughing. “See? Told you so.”

He kissed me, whispering, “Come here.”

Thor picked me up in those powerful arms of his and I looped my legs around his hips, so overeager that I couldn’t help grinding my wet cunt against his pelvis impatiently. He felt for me in the dark and then lined up the head of his cock with me, sliding in at long last.

It was then I invented a new phrase about sex: “Once you’ve had Thor, there is no more.”

I never wanted to fuck another man ever again. Just him.

That was how goddamn _good_ his cock felt.

“Oh, Thor,” I whimpered as I sunk onto him an inch at a time, digging my nails into his shoulders. “Oh, _fuck_ , Thor.”

“Yes,” he groaned into my neck. “Mm, yes, sweetheart, that’s it. Take my cock like a good girl.”

My toes curled. Oh, yes. More of that please. So much more.

He settled both of those big hands over each half of my ass, then steadily lifted me and dropped me, thrusting up with his hips to ensure his cock drove deep, plunging into me and sending shuddering waves of pleasure racing up my skin and through every nerve. Thor’s sex was like fire, consuming me from the inside out, spreading quickly over every bit of me.

“I knew you would love this,” he whispered to me, biting my ear lobe gently. “I knew you would love my cock, sweetheart. You feel it deep inside, don’t you? Taking you over and over again. Mm, it feels so good, doesn’t it? Now I need you to come for me.”

“Fuck, Thor,” I whined as I tried not to let his filthy words get to me, but I knew I couldn’t help myself. He fucked like a champion, every thrust smooth and hitting all the right spots. I was putty in his hands. “Please, not yet, just a little longer.”

He chuckled. “No. Now. Come now, my lady. Give me what I want. What we both want. You’re so tight around me. You’re begging for it. You’re aching for it.”

“Goddammit, Thor!” I flew over the edge, bucking against his hard, sweaty chest as I came again. Thor rumbled in my ear, pleased, slowing his thrusts to let me float down from my climax.

“Good girl,” he purred, painting sloppy kisses over one side of my throat. “Sweet girl.”

“Bastard,” I murmured back, which made him laugh.

“Relax, sweetheart,” Thor said. “I think perhaps you need to be more…”

He took a few steps back from the wall, which got my attention. “…flexible.”

His hands slid to my thighs and he lifted me, sliding his cock nearly all the way out devilishly slow. I clung to him, arms around his neck, shaking with anticipation. He let gravity do the work of sinking me back onto his cock. I cried out sharply as an acute red-hot spike of pleasure speared up through my body. Christ, he was huge and this position only allowed him to reach deeper than before. I was done for.

Thor rocked his hips up to meet me each time I came down on his cock, the power and precision in his muscled arms allowing him to set the perfect pace. I leaned my head back and just sunk into him completely, letting him have all of me, throwing myself to the mercy of a god. I’d like to think that I made it more than five minutes, but time itself just ceased to exist for a while and it wasn’t long before I was convulsing around him again in total ecstasy.

The next time I roused from my sex coma, Thor had cleared the desk and lay me on it, his smile affectionate yet devious as he watched me get my bearings. He kissed me and brushed my hair out of my eyes. “Are you alright, sweetheart?”

“Never better. Though I have to admit that I won’t be able to keep up with you if we go for your record twelve times.”

Thor laughed. “I promise that is not my intention.”

“Just had to be sure.”

“Mm,” he said between the next couple kisses. “Just once more. You are so enticing, my lady. I cannot help wanting more and more of you.”

I paused, nibbling my lower lip. “And…after that?”

Thor met my gaze. “Mm?”

“Um, what happens after tonight? Do we just say goodbye and go back to normal?”

“You are out of your mind if you think I shall let you slip away that easily,” he said quite seriously. “You are not a conquest for me. I seek you as you are, all of you, not just your body. If you will have me.”

“It’ll be complicated,” I warned him.

“Most things are.”

I smiled up at the fearlessness in his eye. “Yes. I think I’m ready to take a walk on the wild side.”

“As am I.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and brought him down to me, looping my legs around his waist. The desk lurched as he thrust into me, palms flat to the tabletop, growling and moaning softly against my lips as he took me third time. We embraced each other’s rising excitement and moved as one, the tension building and building inside, blossoming into something utterly incredible. I felt so incredibly good that I could hardly stand it, but I didn’t want to go alone this time.

“Thor,” I whispered, biting his plump bottom lip gently. “Thor, please, come.”

He shuddered above me. “Not yet, sweetheart.”

“Now, Thor, please.” I flexed my inner walls over his cock, felt him twitch, felt his body pitch forward to find a new angle, felt his urgency. “Thor, you feel so good.”

I kissed down the side of his jaw, tasting his sweat, and he groaned loudly, picking up speed. “Mm, my lady, please.”

“Come, Thor, come for me.” I bit his neck. “I want you to come. Come inside me.”

“Fuck,” he hissed, pounding into me, gripping a handful of my hair and yanking my head back. The desk clamored under our combined weight and Thor’s strength, but it held. He kissed me hard as he reached the edge, pistoning into me with maddening speed, taking me with him. We both cried out and writhed in unison as the orgasm raked through us both. We pressed out sweaty foreheads together and stayed there in the darkness for a while, just breathing each other in, the storm inside us gradually calming.

Then, curiously, my office phone rang.

Frowning, I reached over and answered it, not hiding my confusion. “Hello?”

“So, uh, how’d your night go?” Madison asked in a supremely smug voice.

I glanced at the Norse god between my legs and didn’t even bother hiding a grin. “Good.”

“Great. You can tell me all about it in the morning, you naughty girl. And tell Thor I said good night.”

“Tell him yourself.” I held the receiver out to him.

“Good night, Madison,” Thor said cheerfully.

She was laughing hysterically when I hung up.

I guess I owe her lunch next week. But only if she doesn’t say “I told you so.”

FIN


End file.
